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Showing posts from August, 2011

Thoughts of Others???

This has been on my mind over the last few days, if not more....


As I was walking through the gym the other day I started to wonder who there thought I was fat. And despite the fact that I have lost 90 lbs I still have those feeling of others judging the way I look. Like today, I was in the free weight room and was the only female in there for most of the time. And apart from a couple of older gentlemen all the other guys that were in there are very very fit, muscular. Not to sound conceited in any terms but I noticed as I was doing my different exercises that some of them were looking at me. And the reason I said that I was not being conceited because in my mind these guys were thinking: What the hell is SHE doing in here; even though most of them see me pretty much on a regular basis. I honestly don't know what they are saying as I can't read minds (only if I could, lol). Maybe if one of them would strike up a conversation with me I would get a better feel as to what they are…

The Ups and Downs of My Week....

Well, this week has been interesting. On Friday I had my weigh in and was down to 152 lbs. Not as much as I wanted to lose since it was only .6 of a pound from the week before but I chalked it up to me starting my period soon. But the weekend kicked my ass in the food department. I think the only half way decent day I had was Saturday. Plus I didn't workout on Sunday since my mother-in-law was in town for a short time and we wanted to hit the beach. In the past I have been able to work off the little bit of weight gain from the weekend by the time my weigh in hits but this time I haven't been able to. Even with it being TOM I still haven't seen this big of a gain. As of today, the day before my weigh in day, I'm up 2.6 lbs. I'm thinking some of it is TOM and some of it is muscle gain. I have noticed that over the last week or so as I was doing my weight lifting I have had to go up on weight and reps to get that "muscle fatigued" feeling. I go for my 3rd b…

Great News....

Great news, anyone?


As of last Friday's weigh in I'm only .2 lbs away from reaching the 90 lb lost mark!!! That means only 10 more pounds and I will have lost 100 lbs!!! Plus I bought my very pair of jeans in a single digit....size 8!! I also tried on this cute dress in a size Medium. Looking at it on the hanger I didn't think that it would fit, it would be too small...but it fit perfectly. The only down side was that it was a little long for my body type. Since I have bigger legs I need dresses that end above the knee and this ended below. I felt like it made me feel stumpy. But I know that I'm that much closer to finding a good dress for myself soon. 


My workouts are going better and better. I'm getting stronger and able to move up my weights and getting closer and closer to where I was before. I'm very happy that I'm able to get back to my squats and lunges with no lasting problems. One of my greatest fears is injuring myself to where I have to stop workin…

Update on "Doubts From A Mental Game"

I have been doing better the last couple days after I wrote my last blog. I'm up to eating about 1600-1700 calories a day since I'm burning about 1000 at the gym and I haven't had that hungry feeling. I do believe I was bored so I started to think about food which triggered my brain into thinking I was hungry. I ended up talking to my BF in New Mexico later that night and it totally got my mind off food. I need to start keeping my mind busy. So at least I know I'm not starving myself. 


I have even lost the couple of pounds that I gained from last weekends' eating. I know in reality that I didn't really gain those couple of pounds, that it was mostly water weight from the sodium from eating out a few times. But I can also say that as of today I'm down another 1.2 lbs but tomorrow is my official weigh in day...if my weight stays true (I know that it can shoot back up that it fluctuates daily, but I have been keeping a chart for the last 11 days and it seems to…

Doubts From A Mental Game.....

Could I be doing too much at the gym, calorie burning wise? Or could it be that the fact that I let myself eat whatever I wanted over the last two weekends screw my brain up: telling myself that I'm hungry when I'm not, that I HAVE eaten enough for the day? I'm thinking its more of the latter since I have done this type of workout before and been able to be satisfied with the amount I'm eating. In fact I'm eating more now than I did then. I really think this is a mental game right now. Last week I had no problem staying with this calorie range and I'm burning just as many calories as then. Maybe I'm just bored and don't have enough to keep my mind occupied, so I'm centering on food again. My kids start back to school in a week and when they do I'm setting myself up on a schedule as if I was working again. 
Sometimes I really hate this game that we have to play to find the right balance. Yes, it seems like I have been harping on finding that balan…

Motivating? Me? (and other random thoughts)

Who would have ever thought that I could be the type of person who motivates people to lose weight? Not me, that's for sure. But I guess I am. I received an email on Saturday from SparkPeople stating that I have been voted as a SparkPeople Motivator. I don't feel like I have done anything special to receive this status. I just got my A$$ off the couch and into the gym and sweated it off, along with eating better foods in smaller amounts. Anyone can do that, what's special about me? And that's where I need to stop thinking like that. I am special....everyone is special. And if what I'm doing is helping someone else then that's an added bonus. Don't get me wrong. I have no problems talking about what I'm doing or what I have done in the past. I just never thought anyone could use what that is and put it to use in their own lives to make a difference.


Also on Saturday I had a friend tell me that I'm looking great and smaller and smaller every time she s…

Weigh In Update and Other Great Surprises

So I had my weigh in today....I'm down 1.4 lbs for the week...it wasn't the 1.6-1.8 I was shooting for but I'm happy with it. It brings my weight loss down to a total of 88 lbs, that's only 2 lbs from 90 and puts me solidly in the mid 150's. I can definitely see me hitting my goal of being in the 140's by the time I go for my next Bod Pod test. So I'm still shooting for another 1.6-1.8 gone for next week. I'm still sticking with the higher calorie intake for the next week to see if what I'm doing is actually working or if it was just a fluke this week. 


One of my great surprises for the day came from my workout at the gym. I have had to put off doing squats and lunges due to some pain in my knee when I bent it at that angle, came from all my running (one of the reasons I backed off running so much). But since Tyler came home from his TDY and started back on swing shift I have been able to get to the gym without the kids in tow and get back to my weig…

Thoughts on my next weigh in....

I can't stop thinking about my weigh in tomorrow. Yes, after all this time and after all that I have accomplished over the last year I still look to the scale as a weigh of measuring my success. It's the way I'm wired. Do I get disappointed when I have a gain, yes slightly since most of the gains that I have had over the year have came from spending time in my home town. But I have never let any of them stop me from continuing on this journey. 


Then why am I so centered on this weigh in? I am down to losing the last 30 lbs and I have never been in this position before. And you always hear that the closer you are to reaching the ultimate goal the harder the pounds are to come off. I'm not looking to lose 2 lbs a week, I have hardly had those weeks....on average I lose about 1.6 lbs a week. Plus I have completely change my calorie intake to help with how many calories I'm burning at the gym. 


It's a scary thought that I need to eat anywhere from 1500-1800 calories …

August Goals

For the first time since starting this journey over 13 months ago I'm writing down goals that I want to meet for the month of August. I'm going to do my damnest to meet each of these but I know that if I don't I gave it my all and that it won't deter me from finishing my ultimate goal. So here goes nothing:


Daily Goals:
Drink at least 8 cups of Water
To eat in the calorie range of  1500-1800
To do a minimum of 30 with a maximum of 90 of Cardio


Weekly Goals:
To get in 6-7 days of cardio
To get in 4-6 days of weight lifting
To lose 1.6-1.8 lbs
To run 2-3 times


Monthly Goals:
To lose 6-7 lbs
To increase weight
To run 7 miles at least 2 times
To increase speed on running




The only goal I foresee giving me any trouble is the weight loss. I have noticed that since I'm about 75% done with my over all goal the weight is coming off slower and slower. I have been trying to do different workouts so that I don't get bored and my body doesn't get bored either. Right now I'm in t…