My Weight Loss Journey

Really feel like a having a big ol' pity party for myself today. I have eaten so much crap and I keep going back to the pantry for more. I HATE days like this. Yeah, it's emotional eating. I'm stuck in my house pretty much day after day after day. The only times I really get out is when I go the gym and when I go to the commissary. Only having one car sucks, but we are hoping to change that status when we get our tax refund and we can get a cheap 2nd car. Not that I will really have any where to go with a 2nd vehicle, but at least I will have the option of leaving if I want to. I need to find a productive hobby that will help with my boredom.  I'm also becoming bored at the gym with my workouts. I really need to find something that will make it interesting again. I usually go through this every couple of months but I always know that once I get going on my workout I feel so much better. But it really is my diet that is driving me crazy. Of course the only one in cha...

So I have been going strong on my weight loss for the last 4 weeks and I have had some really great results. I'm down 8 lbs as of Friday. My workouts have been good, though I am constantly looking for new ways to change up my cardio. Instead of just going for a run I have been doing some interval/sprints on the treadmill. I'm running at 6.0 for half of a quarter mile then walking for a quarter of the quarter mile. It averages out about the same minute per mile but it has helped my breathing, and gives me a really great sweat, so that's a great plus. The downside this weekend hasn't been the greatest for my diet. Today has been a total fat food day. I have found a trigger meal for me that lends me to overeat and feel crappy for doing so. I told my husband that we won't be having this meal again for a while, not until I feel more in control of myself and my diet. Here's to taking it one day at a time. Now that I'm done with the negative here's somethin...

Since 2012 wasn't what I wanted for myself with my weight loss journey I plan on making 2013 10x better.  I plan on losing the last 60ish lbs to finally reach my goal 130 lbs. I plan on being a much happier person, since I know that when I'm happy I have a easier time losing the weight. I will continue to see my therapist to reach that goal to being happy. This year I plan on getting out of my house more often than just going to the commissary or to the gym. I will find something to occupy my time during the day, sitting at home with the four walls closing in isn't the way that I want to live my life. I feel like I have been forgotten by the people in my life...its like the saying "Out of sight, out of mind" really is playing out in my family. But it's up to me to make myself happy, not the other way around. This year I plan on taking my family on a vacation, not sure where yet, but we need to get away from this city for a week or two. Along with a mini ...

Motivation is a great thing. It can help you jump start your weight loss but motivation doesn't last. It's the determination of making that change last for a life time that will get you through the process.  When I started this process close to 2.5 years ago I had some great motivation. My motivation was to prove all those who called me fat, ugly and who knows what else that they were wrong. And once the weight started to fall off and people started to see who I really was the determination started to kick in. I was determined to be that person, but life, thought, and feelings gets in the way. I started to feel tired of doing all the hard work that comes with losing weight and some might say that it's the working out part, but for me that was easy. It's the always being on watch of what I was eating and over a year ago I gave up on that. The result: a 30-35 pound weight gain.  Now its time to find that determination that I know I have in me. I'm not good at sett...

It has been over a year since I have successfully lost any amount of weight. This past week I have seen my weight creep back up close to 190 and its scary. The month of December hasn't seen much time in the gym, 10 days in and I have only worked out twice, though I did get to the gym after my therapy this afternoon. Some the weight gain I have seen I know is due to my period, but still its hard to watch that number go up and up and up.  I can happily say that if I haven't stuck to going to the gym as I have been over the year I know that I would have put all the weight I loss back on, and  possibly  more.  I have decided that today I am getting my life back on track...no more eating crap like I have been lately. No more not caring if I get to the gym. I need to get my life back. I'm slowly falling back into the trap of not being happy with anything in my life. I lived like that for too long. The year of 2011 was one of the happiest that I can remember in a long lon...

I have several emotions going on in my head right now and I'm 100% certain they are the reason I'm having such a hard time with my weight loss right now.  ANGER, PISSED OFF, HURT: I am angry, pissed off and hurt at the one person who is suppose to love me unconditionally. But apparently she either didn't get that memo or what I have been thinking for the last 12 years is really true. That I don't live up to her standards and that her love comes with conditions that I guess I'll never meet. That she has found others to replace me with. I have tried for years to get her to accept me the way that I am and for her to treat me as she does the others in our family, even those are now related through marriage. Hell, I don't even rate as high as some of her friends. I finally cut ties with her, thinking that I can finally move on with my life, no such luck as she doesn't want to abide by my wishes, but then again why should I expect her to. LONELINESS, DEPRESSI...

Over the weekend my husband found out that his grandmother on his dad's side of the family passed away. He spent most of yesterday trying to figure out a way to get back up home, which is about a 3 hour drive, and not leave me and the kids without a car. Oh the joy of only having one vehicle. We finally decided for him to just take the car since he will only be gone over night at the most. And I'm sure that if anything comes up here at home while he is gone that there is someone I can lean on to help me out. It's one of the perks of being apart of the military community.  Here comes the obstacle: my workout. I have a few options to choose from. One being skipping my workout tomorrow and pick back up tomorrow. Two being workout at home (which I can't stand to do, since going to the gym is the only time I leave the house on most days). Three, walking to the gym. I don't mind walking to the gym since it's only about 1.25 miles from my house and I can make it in a...